Sunday, February 27, 2011
CHEERS.
Cheers.
To the people who've hurt us and the others we've jaded equally.
To the people we've lost and the people still here.
To the people we long for and the people we're still searching for.
To the people who stayed and the people whom we just came across with.
To the people who finish our breaths and sentences and the people whose breaths and sentences we want to put to an end.
To the people who trust in fate and the people who trust their own hands.
To the jests blurted out and the angry words spit out.
To the unsaid left unspoken and the spoken just halfmeant.
To the whispered meanings and the yelled out insubstantials.
To the noise in silence and the quiet in storm.
To the notes played with the wind and the syllables written on paper.
To the name across your lips and the kiss that crossed your heart.
To the not-so-mutually-exclusive lies and truth.
To the masked deceit and the transparent kindness.
To the things seen and the things forever sunken.
To the feelings that died and the passion that burned.
To the unveiled light and the transcended darkness.
To the things that actually mattered not and the things supposedly cared for a lot.
To the funniest of loss and the most humane of triumph.
To the smiles in pain and the tears in happiness.
To the sweetest goodbye and the most sorrowful hello.
To the endless dreams and slumber under the spring moon and the intricate patterns and routines under the winter sun.
To the cities under the sea and the floating ones in the sky.
To the letters you can read and the phrases between the lines.
To life, and love, and reasons.
To everything we had that's no longer there.
To you and me.
GOOD NIGHT.
ianne ended @ 1:31:00 AM
Thursday, February 17, 2011
SCATTERBRAIN
I watched for long minutes as people dragged time and dust along with their feet and shopping bags with them. Steadily, I aimed my vision towards the woman carrying a purchased toy, for some boy, I would bet. As she catches my stare, I looked away, with the awkward feeling of wishing she didn't look my way too.
What could have made her turn her head to where I am? Do we all get the feeling we are being watched? Do we all just get a glimpse of people who we think we could be interested in on our peripheries? Where does that hunch or instinct come from?
One thing that amazes me in this life is the way we find connection with people around us. It's like nature's way of helping us remember that we are humans, and there are those like us around, and we must notice them despite the everyday worldly and unnecessary things we get busy about. In one way or another, no matter how hard it is to open doors or take a peek in windows of people we don't really know, we always find that hole in the wall wherein we find the chance to burrow ourselves in and get through. Sometimes it seems as if there are these thin threads that pull us close to somewhere or- actually- someone, we never know we will need in our lifetime, or will need us in theirs, or for no apparent and unfathomable reason at all.
Sometimes, however, when we soon begin to be tight and bound to them like there's no escape, at the same time, we sort of begin to lose the shared magic of having them around, in our life. It feels as if they'd be around forever, like they will never go away. We all get tired of the same things we share, because we already know how they flicker their eyelids when they are thinking, or how they curl their lips before they speak. We grow tired and begin to search for new things, new people, because we thought that that magic we once got a hold of was already gone. We all begin to forget the fact that it was magic, finding one like them in a sea of a hundred billion people or more. Once it happens, one of you gets left behind with memories, and that feeling of longing, and loss, and the deep desire to reconnect.
But enough of the taking-people-for-granted thing. The cliche tires me out. I just thought you'd be more interested if I began with something you all can relate to, or at least just know about. :)
For honestly, I just want someone to just listen to me with full and undivided attention, without interruption. Straight, eyes locked on me, and ears open. Listen to me.
It is a sad thought sometimes that when i try to say something, well, not necessarily just about myself, i get interrupted, stop talking and then noone seems to notice. Aweful. I know this happens to all of us, but how do i cope up, with all that stuff in my head wanting to just burst out of my mouth? Especially when i know that the words i will speak won't be enough to even halfly convey what they really mean.
Good mor---night. Yet another late night fudge which keeps me awake.
Good mor---night world. As half of your children lie asleep in mats and beds and cement floors, I shall keep watch of the night and check if the coast is clear. Good mor---night world. As half of your children start their day with routines and traditions, I shall pass my plans and be on guard. Good mornihht world. As you spin and turn a new side to the new sun, old hearts break and others are learning to mend or just beat, even just for the heck of it.
ianne ended @ 1:26:00 AM
